The Angry Andreaa Show #39

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So our Alisha lives with me && me mum.. She is my sister’s daughter but she doesnt get on with me sisters partner so instead of having rows with her step-dad all the time she moved in with us.. Shes 13 && a typical teenager.. Davidd says she is exactly like the little tearaway that I used to be when I was her age but I cant see it meself like.. She can be a pain but she is mostly out with her mates so we dont see her that much.. She comes in to eat && to sleep && other than that shes in school or with her mates.. So last week I knew something was wrong because she was always in the house && wouldnt go out.. So I was like whats up Lish but she wouldnt say anything just said she didnt feel like goin out.. Then on Friday last week she didnt want to go to school.. She loves being in school, shes pretty clever or at least cleverer than I was && she loves being with her mates so now I knew something was wrong..

The Angry Andreaa Show #38

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Last week I went to see a clairvoyant.. I know loads of people think they are shit && they just con ya but I have been before && me mum && sisters have been too.. This one always says stuff that they couldn’t of guessed.. So if it is all a load of shit, how do they know all this stuff about my family?? Davidd even says they ask clever questions to get info out of ya but this woman never asked me nothin the other night, she just told me stuff.. Some of the stuff she told me upset me && actually had me in tears but overall I was made up with most of the stuff she told me..

The Angry Andreaa Show #37

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Do you fancy a bit of banter?? Remember that smackhead woman I ran out of our shop the other week because shes barred for shoplifting?? Well… the other day I finished work at 2pm cos I was on an early && was walking to me car && there she was.. So she snarls me && I was on me phone so I snarled her back.. So she waited til she got round the corner && started shouting shit at me.. So I started screaming at her && told her to get back to me && id wipe the floor with her && called her a dirty little crackhead.. I havent had a proper fight since I was in school with Lorah so I was thinkin this is going to kick off here but she legged it.. It was funny but I was fumin, cheeky little slag!!

The Angry Andreaa Show #36

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Davidd told me a story the other day about a dog in China. The dog belonged to this woman who saved him when he was a puppy. So the dog pure loved her and used to wait for her at the end of the road where she worked. Every day she came out of work and the dog was waiting there for her and off they went home. So one day the woman was killed in an accident so the dog was just left waiting for her. The dog was seen for 80 days waiting in the middle of the road dodgin traffic and looking for his mum. People tried to help the dog but he just ran away whenever anyone went near him. Taxi drivers even stopped to feed him and he would take the food but then run off. The owners friendship with the dog was that special that he wouldnt leave in case he missed her and just stayed standing guard.

The Angry Andreaa Show #35

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The other night I rang Davidd to have one of our little chats while I was driving home from work.. I was in a funny mood && I told him some skatty things I have done && I thought I better tell yaas before he does, coz hes a right snitch.. We was talkin about cars && I said to him that it was positively baltic outside.. I was freezing walking from work to me car.. As I was driving home I noticed the little ice crystal was lit up on me dashboard so I told Davidd that when I first passed me test two years ago I never knew what it meant && so I took me car to Ford to get it fixed coz I thought it meant there was something wrong with me car.. The fella in Ford was pissin himself at me that day!!

The Angry Andreaa Show #34

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Hiya Toasters && am sorry I never wrote yas an Angry Show the other week but have been in pain…. I keep gettin these horrible pains down me arm && then it ends up goin down me legs too && I keep gettin like dead tired too…. Me Mum has fibromyalgia so am hopin its not that…. It gives ya headaches && like feeling numb in ya hands && feet…. It can make ya have problems with ya memory too – they call that a “fibro fog”…. Me Mum has that because we started thinking she was getting dementia like me grandad but then the doctor said it was part of the fibromyalgia…. I dont think I have had memory problems but I cant really remember…. Hahaha that was one of Davidds jokes the mad kunt!!

The Angry Andreaa Show #33

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So am back in work now after me lovely holiday && Im already stressed. We have got a new security man && he is a total knob. The other day he was due to start his shift at 3pm && he turned up at 1pm just to piss me off. He literally spent two hours in the shop without being paid just so he could follow me round && ruin me day. So first of all the Costa coffee machine come up that it needed a cleaning cycle. The machine needs to be cleaned out every few days but its all automatic ya just have to put the cleaning fluid in it && start the cycle — the machine does the rest.

The Angry Andreaa Show #32

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Hiya Toasters, am back from me holibobs so Davidd said I had to tell yas all about it. So I went to Turkey again because I have been goin there for years and I know loads of people there. The only problem was a Hurricane decided to come on its holiday to Turkey too. I cant remember its name so I have been calling it Hurricane Sally. It lasted for about three days where it was really windy and it was raining and thundering too. I bloody hate thunder it scares the life out of me. When I told Davidd about it he said I needed a Thunder Buddy to get me through it.

The Mystery Of The Locked House

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The Wallace family were a pair of weirdos.. William was a insurance saleman and he lived with his Missus Julia in Anfield.. He was a sick man who was always in hospital with kidney problems.. The pair hated stangers and kept away from anyone they didnt know.. A friend called their marriage loveless and they had loads of fights.. One night William came home from work and found his wife had been battered to death inside the locked house.. There was no sign of a murder weapon and the police couldnt find any clues inside the house to help them suss out what had happened..

The Angry Andreaa Show #31

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I Passed Ya Know! I have been an assistant manager for the shop I work for, for yonks. It means I always have a manager watching me and telling me wot to do — or checking wot I do if I do sumthin’ meself. Even though I get on with me manager I really want to be a manager meself. So after me last appraisal thingy with our area manager he always asks ya wot ya wanna be doing in like five years or something. So I told him I wanted to be a manager of me own shop.