Jammy Toast And The Nudist Beach

Posted by Lord Bearkeeper OBE DASc on
Category: Holidays/Events17 Comments

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Iwas reading the newspaper today when I came across the news that Paris is opening a nudist park. In a semi-secluded clearing near a bird reserve in the Bois de Vincennes Park, will be their very first permanent park dedicated to nudism. The article stated that nudists have long been demanding to have their own green spot in the French capital. More than 400 naturist beaches and camp sites exist in France, where more than 2.5 million people practice nudism but this is the first permanent nudist park.

The mayor’s office said the creation of a nudist area, though still in an experimental stage, is “part of an open-minded vision for the use of Parisian public spaces”. The idea has been inspired by Germany, Switzerland and Spain – all countries where nudism has been welcomed for years. “It can be exercised with respect for everyone,” the mayor’s office concluded.

Nothing much to get excited about in the item but it did remind me of our very own experience on a nudist beach while on holiday in Menorca a few years ago. The Chimpton and I decided to visit what looked like a lovely beach in Son Bou. So, in all innocence, we arrived at the beach only to discover it was pretty busy and so we decided to walk further along to get away from the crowds. All we really wanted to do was have a nice sunbathe and top up on the tans. If memory serves me well, this might even have been the place – much to The Chimpton’s revulsion – where I first muttered the immortal line, “sun-cream is for wimps!”

As we walked along the beach the crowds started to thin out but so did the clothing. At first it was just topless sunbathing but then the cry went out from The Chimpton: “Strewth that guy’s got no strides on… and his balls are burnt!”

The Chimpton has many desirable qualities, but alas, subtlety is not one of them.

The further along the beach we wandered the less people we wearing and the more we saw body parts badly burnt by the sun – not always a pretty sight. However, the funniest thing we witnessed along the beach were men on their own standing totally naked trying to impress the ladies. They would be standing there that long that their nether regions would start to lose interest – if you understand my meaning – and so they would have to give it a little tug just to maintain the attention.

Imagine the scene; standing along the edge of the beach on the sandbanks there was a line of men who every so often would have a little tug just to keep their little soldier standing to attention.

I swear, you couldn’t make this stuff up if you tried!

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About the Author

Lord Bearkeeper OBE DASc

A sad and lonely old man who used to have a life but it has now been taken over by his dedication to the cause of saving Renault Bears, running Jammy Toast and searching eBay, car boot sales, charity shops, lofts and even under beds for his beloved bears. He has even now taken in Flat Eric to save him from homelessness – his life is no longer his own!

17 Comments on “Jammy Toast And The Nudist Beach”

  1. HAHAHA :roflao: Now that was a funny day. Men with little weeners that they kept pulling at. Wouldn’t mind but it must of hurt they were so red from being burnt. I spent the day laughing. Never saw anyone under the age of 50 or a nice weener either. Nudist beaches are very disappointing.

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