The email read, “We have looked at your website closely and we feel we can help you double the sales made by your visitors.” Well if you had looked a bit closer you stupid person, you would have noticed we don’t actually sell anything. So I guess they are correct; zero multiplied by two is still zero. Mission accomplished. Then there is Kiley Muszynski who offers to tell us how to become billionaires more or less overnight using a method described in Forbes magazine. Surely Kiley, if you did have the secret of making a few bob you would have done so yourself and would no longer be using a free Gmail account for your little scams?
This year has seen Google celebrate its 18th Birthday and during those years the search engine company has become a byword for internet searches. People don’t search the internet they Google it. However, they were not the first people to realise the importance of being able to find information on the Internet. That honour goes to a man by the name of Jonathon Fletcher who invented the modern search engine but, until a couple of years ago, was unaware of what he had accomplished.
The lunatics have definitely taken over the asylum over at Warner Brothers who have now asked Google to remove its own website from search results, reporting itself for violating copyright laws. It also asked the search giant to remove links to legitimate movie streaming websites run by Amazon and Sky, as well as the film database IMDB. The request was submitted on behalf of Warner Brothers by Vobile, a company that files hundreds of thousands of takedown requests every month. Warner Brothers itself has yet to comment.
It is the place where we go when we get bored of everything else. While there we can communicate to anyone without even speaking, we can meet people without either of us leaving home and we can do the shopping, sort out banking and watch movies at the click of a mouse. It is a repository for all the knowledge that mankind possesses and yet it is difficult to believe it, but the World Wide Web is now twenty five years old and has changed the lives of millions of people around the world.
It had to happen sooner or later but one of Google’s self-drive cars has crashed into a bus. There were no injuries. This is not the first time one of the famed self-driving cars has been involved in a crash, but it may be the first time it has caused one. Google is to meet with California’s Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) to discuss the incident, and determine where the blame lies. On 14th February the car, travelling at 2mph, pulled out in front of a public bus going 15mph. The human in the Google vehicle reported that he assumed the bus would slow down to let the car out, and so he did not override the car’s self-driving computer. The crash happened in Mountain View, near Google’s headquarters.
Hi, let me introduce myself. My name is Edward Bear and I am the bear responsible for technology here at Jammy Toast. I have lived with The Bearkeeper for seven years now, and in that time I have designed blogs and kept our IT equipment running. I have been asked to write a column every now and then on the subject of technology – which is what I am going to start today. Also I will try to keep everyone up to speed with our plans for Jammy Toast. I think The Bearkeeper is thinking of retiring because he is getting everybody else to take over writing on the new Jammy Toast which used to be his job on the old Jammy Toast.
Would you believe that Google’s Research & Development team is looking at developing internet-connected teddy bears that will control smart home appliances? The firm has published a patent that describes teddy bears that would turn their heads towards users and listen to what they were saying, before sending commands to remote computer servers. The three-year old patent was spotted recently by the legal technology firm SmartUp. It described the proposal as “one of Google’s creepiest patents yet”.