The Angry Andreaa Show #7

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Category: The Angry Andreaa Show29 Comments

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Rytee Everyy1 Puree Luvvd Daa Fingg Wee Didd Abwtt Daa Nuttas .. I didd 1 Abwtt Liverpooll && Davidd Didd 1 Abwtt Birkenheadd ,, Hee Alwayys Copiess Mee Yernoo .. Soo Att Daa Weekendd A Wentt Too Mee Dadds && Toldd Himm I Wozz Puree Tellinn Yaas All Abwtt Daa Nuttas && Hee Wozz Lykk Gettinn All Famouss Onn Himselff .. AA Wozz Likee Dadd ,, Itss Onlii A Fukkinn Blogg Itss Nott Britanss Gott Talentt Daa Yaa Onn .. Fukkinn Bigg Edd Himm Yernoo !!

Soo Hee Toldd Mee Daa Derrs A Pubb Inn Liverpooll Called Daa Postt Officee .. It’ss Inn Schooll Lanne Inn Daa Cityy Centree .. Itss Called Daa Bcoss Itt Ustaa Bee A Reall Postt Officee Lykk && Diss Placee Iss Full Taa Chokka Wiff Nuttas .. Firstt Off All Derr Iss Briann Daa Barmann Cozz Amm Guessinn Hee’ss Daa Barmann Lykk .. Dee Call Briann “Noo Bull Briann” Cozz Hee Alwayss Tells Yaa A Storyy Thenn Sayss “Honestt ,, Noo Bull !!” && Hee Hass A Sayinn Off Daa Dayy && Callss Itt Hiss Wordds Off Wisdomm .. Lastt Tymm Mee Dadd Wozz Derr Itt Wozz “Iff Itt Takks 2 Too Fangoo ,, Howw Manny Doess Itt Takk Too Foxtrott ??”

Denn Derrs Davee Daa Ravee (Noo Nott Ourr Davidd !!) && He’ss Daa Bestt Customerr Cozz Hee’ss Alwayys Pissedd !! Whenn Davee Daa Ravee Wantts Too Goo Forr A Bevvy Hee Puree Tells Hiss Wifee Daa Hee’s Goinn Taa Gett A Stammp && Goess Daa Postt Officee .. Soo Dee All Jokee Daa Itts Lykk A Postt Officee && A Pubb All Inn Onee .. Davee’s Wifee Puree Finkks Hee Wrytes Abwtt 300 Lettass A Munff Cozz Hee’s Alwyys Goinn Daa Postt Officee !!

Liverpooll Iss Daa Onlyy PLacee Wherr Yaa Cann Cashh Yaa Giroo && Gett Pissedd Inn Onee Tripp LMFAOO !!

Mee Dadd Sayss Daa Hee Finkks Davee Daa Ravee Hass Puree Been Barred Owwt Cozz Hee Drinkks Inn Maa’ Egertonns Noww && Briann Daa Barmann Hass Been Sakkd .. Iff Yaa Goo Inn Derr Lookinn Forr Briann Dee All Shoutt Owtt “Briann Hass Leftt Daa Buildinn” Cozz He Puree Luvvs Elviss && Hass Bigg Sidiess ..

Denn Derrs Diss Mann Wiff Lykk Massivv Earrs Whoo Alwayss Goess Onn Kareokee Nitee .. Hee Alwayss Singgs Lykk Oldd Frankk Sinatraa Songgs && Hee’s Abwtt 90 Yearss Oldd Soo Dee All Call Himm “Neww Kidd Onn Daa Blokk” .. Mee Dadd Finkks Hiss Reall Namme Iss Albertt && Loadss Takk Daa Piss Butt Hee’s Actuallyy Quitee Gudd ..

I Toldd Mee Dadd Datt I Wozz Tellinn Yaas All Abwtt Jackoo Daa Cardboardd Guitarr Mann && Datt Davidd Foundd Owtt Daa Hee Hadd Diedd Inn A Nursinn Homee && Hee Wozz Guttedd .. Hee Saidd Daa Jackoo Taughtt Ericc Claptonn Everyfingg Hee Knowws — Whoevaa Daa Iss Lykk ??

Mee Unclee Robb Whoo Iss A Puree Evertoniann Sayys Daa Liverpooll Footiee Clubb Triedd Too Signn Himm Upp Too Doo Daa Halff Timee Entertainmentt Att Anfieldd Butt Dee Cuddntt Affordd Himm !!

Billy Butlerr Saidd Onn Radioo Merseysidee Daa Dee Arr Goinn Too Putt A Statuee Off Himm Inn Williammson Squarr Ass A Memoriall Too Himm .. I Finkk Daa Wudd Bee A Greatt Ideaa ..

Nextt Tymm I will Tell Yass All Abwtt Pigeonn Petee (Nott Ferall Petee!) Whoo Ustaa Feed All Daa Pigeonss Att Daa Pierr Headd .. I Wouldaa Dunn Itt Inn Today’ss Storyy Butt A Cannt Rememberr Itt All Soo I Will Havee Too Ringg Mee Dadd .. Amm Gettinn Ass Forgetfull Ass Grannyy Heree Lykk !!

Traa Faa Noww !!

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Andreaa

I Am Andreaa And I Am Havin' A Boss Time Here Writing On Da Blog && That 'Coz Davidd Is Proper Gettin' Too Old To Write && It's Doin' Me Wig In .. I Feel Proper Ashamed Da Fukin' State .. Davidd Told Me To Write Yas Little Stories About Me Life But I Said No ,, I Can't Write Stories But He Bullies Me Yerno .. Fuck Me I Never Even Passed Mee GCSE English So This Is Gonna Be Shite !!


29 Comments on “The Angry Andreaa Show #7”

  1. I really think that Andreaa doesn’t know just how funny she is. I was sitting here drinking my cup of tea and reading her post when I came across the line, “Jackoo Taughtt Ericc Claptonn Everyfingg Hee Knowws.” Needless to say the tea was spat out all over the cat.

    Andreaa, thanks for making an old man very happy!

  2. Policeman accidentally captures moment seagull steals his fish supper!

    You’re walking along the seafront with your fish and chips, taking in the sea air. You get your phone out because you want to capture this moment forever: fish and chips by the sea – what could be better? That’s what one off-duty policeman had in mind when he was ambling along the esplanade at the weekend.

    But what would have been a pleasant but rather pedestrian seaside snap ended up being far more impressive, as he caught the exact moment when a seagull made off with a portion of his battered cod…

  3. I wonder where all the mentalists will go when they close all the soak holes?

    In other news I spoke too soon Dad. My head is starting to crumble again. Plus the stomach is whirling. Gippy will be along soon! :sad:

  4. Dad and I had a bit of a row at the weekend. As you all know he makes out that he’s a good father. Well this weekend I had to ring childline. Dad gave me one of his infamous whacks – have you seen the size of his arms? :sad:

    Needless to say I’m still bruised. :sad:

      1. Just for the record I have never laid a hand on her except when she deserves it!! That is what she goes to London for. It is some sort of strange Sex Fetish where some woman gives her black eyes. Go figure!!

        And Chimpton does have a small ski slope nose that is just the angle the picture was take from Chinny… and while we’re on the subject what’s going on with those chubby chops?

  5. My son asked why some Mummies and Daddies live in different houses. So I sat him down and told him the truth… their kids complained about slow WiFi and never went to bed on time.

  6. Daaaaaaad. Gippy Grewal. WTF. Will these headaches go fuck right off. Do you think I need some ‘Special’ medicine dad? I think I need to move to California!

    1. Depends what you mean by ‘Special Medicine’. Are we talking about spermy nuisance here? Is Californian nuisance better than UK nuisance? No NHS in California!

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