The Story Of Aleksandr Orlov #2

Posted by Aleksandr Orlov on
Category: Meerkats37 Comments

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Aleksandr and Sergei working on new book.

Today I continues tell peoples all about my life. Due to popular demand I have decide to tell my bear friends at Jammy Toast about amazing story of Orlov family. From amazing journey across Kalahari Desert to beginnings of meerkat comparing business on streets of Moscow. I am hoping from money Davidd pay to re-marble roof of Orlov Family mansion. Many meerkats have soggy fur because of hole in roof of mansion when it rain and lie in bed at night lookings at stars. I also say big thank you to Sergei who type for me on old typewriter found in attic in Meerkovo. Please enjoyment this

Chapter 2: Escape.

The meerkats walked for days and days. Between them they only had a few bags of beetle bits (plus not forget the fleas living in Seri’s fur) and some precious gemstones of Seri’s. The hunger grumble at them always. They invent new game, Eye-Spy, to take minds off it, but got stuck once they had done "S" for "Sand". Mostly they just walk in silence, dreaming of caramelised larvae.

Some days the big orange sandstorms would sting their eyes and tangle up their fur. Other days, the quietness would boom in their ears and they would have to sing to keep from desert craziness.

"We are doomed. Are we doomed?" Kefentse would say.

"Yes, we are doomed." Seri would replay.

Then one evening, after a long days walk, Kafentse looked up to the sky and saw a cloud that looked like a meerkat’s claw. Seri thought it looked more like a weird show, but Kefentse took it as a sign of good bodings.

Then everything in the distance got wobbly. Kefentse thought he might be seeing mirage. Seri thought he was having one of his funny turns. (He had delicate stomach, and often felt nauseous. Sergei like this, too. He often nause.) But as they got nearer, they see wobbly thing was the sea.

There seemed to be a small town near the shore. The meerkats hurried towards it, imagining all sorts of delightfulness. But when they got there it was very empty. Shack after shack was abandon. It was look like a ghost town in classic Wild West film (except they didn’t know that, as films had not been invent yet).

Then they get to shack with a sign over it. It say; 'The Queasy Mongoose Tavern'. Outside, an old muskrat suck on a clay pipe. They could smell his musk from where they stood.

The muskrat said he knew of beautiful far-off land full of grubs and beetles and grasshoppers. The land of Bermudas. He said he could sell them map and a boat to take them there. The meerkats thanked him and Seri generously donated his treasured collection of desert gemstones as payment.

The next morning they go to see the muskrat’s ship. Kefentse thought it looked very ‘ratty’ with its sails full of hole and patch. But they took the map and with great courageousness stepped on board. Soon the ship, which they named ‘The Courageousness’, was full of sail. The meerkats looked at map. It was totally puzzlements, but soon Seri thought he had plotted course to Bermudas.

After many week, they began to think something was probables wrong. It was getting very cold and still no land.

There were some old ship’s biscuits in bottom of boat. Sometimes they found maggots in them, but mostly they were not that lucky. Seri often had one of his turns; he found the motion of the boat very upset and many time he had to pretend he search for meermaids as he lean over side of boat for hours. (This just like Sergei too. He bad sailor and have to lean over side of Orlov family yacht every time we go sail.)

One Wednesday (they did not know which one) Kefentse was awoke by gigantic bang. There was huge ship with skull and crossbones waving at its mast, and mob of snarly creatures waving cutlasses on the decks. "Mongoose pirates", Kefentse thought. He had heard tell of these sea-faring mongooses. They would surely board 'The Courageousness' and then who knows what? He might be kill, or worse, made to be mongoose slave. Just then, Seri poke his head up. On seeing his mangy frame and bleary eyes, the pirates went all quiet. Quick as flash, Kefentse shouted out that the mongooses could come aboard if they didn’t mind about Seri’s plague. With good timing, Seri made a disgustable splutter – this was really just down to his allergies but the mongoose pirates thought a terrible plague had infected ‘The Courageousness’. They turned tail and fled away. And the meerkats lived to float another day.

One month later, after many more days of mumbling sea shanties and picking at splinters, they were still floating. And they still not know where they were.

Then one day there was crunching noise. They were going aground. It was end of the ocean! They climbed slowly out of boat and crawl up the shore.

To be continued…

Where had Kefentse and Seri landed? Find out soon in Part Three of Aleksandr Orlov’s classic tale of danger and excitement.

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About the Author

Aleksandr Orlov

Founder of comparethemeerkat.com, Aleksandr lives and works in Moscow, where many generations of his family live and thrive. Part-time writer for the bear blog he also has found time to write his autobiography 'A Simples Life'. He enjoys going to the cinema with Sergei. However, he has many troubles dealing with people comparing meerkats and looking for a cheap deal on car insurance. Meerkat -- Market. A son of mongoose could tell difference!


37 Comments on “The Story Of Aleksandr Orlov #2”

    1. Driving Instructors don’t conduct the driving tests in this country so I can keep my dick vids to myself. And before Chimpton starts I don’t take them dogging either!

  1. Like anyone would go dogging with you Dad looking like that! That picture cracks me up. Its just fookin’ weird.

    Matt, Dad is always around New Brighton car parks normally alone! He nearly always has a yellow duster in the front too. Apparently they are very absorbent.

    #DirtyDad #Wanker

  2. Do you ever get excited that you’re pregnant then realize you’re just super bloated because you gotta poop? Also, I sent this same text to my husband. He didn’t reply. Should I tell him my poop isn’t even his?

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  4. If anyone’s waiting for a bus in Bebington? And a lady sidles up and tells you her age . Could you ask her to turn her mobile on and give me a ring ? Ta

    #MothersDay

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