o, Am Still In Isolation Even Though No One Listens To Us.. Me && Me Mum Are Meant To Be In Quarantine Frm People Until Next Tuesday Bt No One Takes Any Notice.. Vicki Has Been Round With The Kids, So Has Dannielle && Gary Said He Couldnt Be Away Frm Me Any Longer So He Come Round Too.. It Doesnt Make Sense That Hes Not Around Though Cos He Was On Holiday With Us && If We Had Anythin So Would He.. The Only Person Who Hasnt Been Round Is Julia Because Her Son Ethan Has Asthma So It Would Be Bad If He Got The Rona Thingy.. We Hve Been Quite Good Though, Me && Me Mum, We Got The Shoppin Delivered Which Me Mum Hates Cos They Swap Half The Stuff For Shit.. I Hve Walked Luna Bt Ive Been Doin It Late At Night When No One Is About.. Even Me Nan Wanted To Come Round Bt Me Mum Told Her No She Is Old && The Rona Is Bad On Old People So Vicki Went && Saw Her Instead.. When Ya Read About People Who Are Stuck In Hospital For Months With The Rona Ya Realise Just How Bad That Can Bee Cos Am F*ckin Fed Up Lookin At The Wallpaper In Ours..
Anyway, Cos Hve Just Been Stuck In The House I Hve Got Nothin To Write About So I Thought I Would Tell Ya This Boss Story I Found On The Internet.. While We Was On Holiday It Was Liverpools Birthday.. No One Really Knows For Sure When Liverpool First Appeared Bt No One Hardly Mentions It Before 1207.. I Know That Because Of This Boss Story All About It.. There Might Hve Still Been A Liverpool Before That Bt It Was That Small It Wasnt Documented In Anythin That Was Official.. In The Doomsday Book, In 1087 Which William The Conqueror Had Done So That He Could Tax People With Land, Liverpool Is Not Even Mentioned.. There Is A Manor Of West Derby Which Might Be Somethin To Do With Liverpool, Because We Still Hve A West Derby In Liverpool Today, Bt That Is Only Guessing..
Somethin That Is Mad, Is That A Load Of Land Where Liverpool Now Is Was Given To Someone Called Warine Of Lancaster By Henry II As A Pressie.. Warine Was Henrys Falconer (That Might Be Why We Hve Liverbirds??).. Bein A Falconer Must Hve Been A Boss Job If They Give You A Pressie That Good.. The Thing Is, It Wasnt Called Liverpool At The Time, It Was Called Lurpul..
The Shit Hit The Fan In 1207 Though..
King John Already Owned The Manor Of Tokestath && Smeedon (Toxteth && Smithdown??) && Made A Huntin Park There In 1204.. He Decided To F*ck Warine Off && Take The Land Of Lurpul For Himself.. He Wanted To Build A Port For His Ships.. He Wanted Somewhere Where He Could Get Across To Ireland Quickly && Sort Out Any Trouble If The Irish Started Kickin Off.. The King Wanted To Use Chester Bt Some Cranky Earl, Didnt Lyk The King && So Stopped Him.. So If The King Had A Port In Lurpul, He Could Do What He Wanted Without The Earl Of Chester Stickin His Oar In..
Warine De Lancaster Was Dead By This Time Bt The King Gave His Son Some Compensation Of Land Somewhere Else..
So On 28th August 1207, King John Issued A Royal Charter That Created The New Borough Of Lurpul.. Part Of The Charter Invited People To Start Livin In Lurpul && If Ya Moved There Ya Didnt Hve To Pay As Much Taxes.. Davidd Said Thats Probably Why Ken Dodd Lived Here!! They Also Gave You Some Land To Live On Dead Cheap.. If Ya Look On The Side Of The Walker Art Gallery In Liverpool Today, There Is A Frieze Showin King John Givin The Royal Charter To The Steward Of West Derby.. The Charter Was Called The Letter Patent && Was Written In Latin Bt It Says:
“John, By The Grace Of God, King Of England, Lord Of Ireland, Duke Of Normandy && Aquitaine, Count Of Anjou, To All His Faithful People Who Hve Desired To Hve Burgages In The Township Of Lurpul, Greeting.. Know Ye That We Hve Granted To All Our Faithful People Who Hve Taken Burgages In Lurpul That They May Hve All The Liberties && Free Customs In The Township Of Lurpul Which Any Free Borough On The Sea Has In Our Land.. && Therefore We Command You That Securely && In Our Peace You Come There To Receive && Inhabit Our Burgages.. && In Witness Hereof We Transmit To You These Our Letters Patent.. Witness Simon De Pateshill At Winchester On The Twenty-Eighth Day Of August In The Ninth Year Of Our Reign..”
The Original Document, That Was Written In 1207, Is Still In The Liverpool Records Office Today..
When King John Granted The Charter, He Told Lurpul To Create A New Town Plan.. So They Did A Plan Of What The New Borough Was Goin To Look Lyk.. In The Plan They Put The Main Seven Streets Which Are Still Here Today.. They Are Chapel Street, Water Street (Originaly Bank Street), High Street (Original Juggler Street), Dale Street, Tithebarn Street (Originally Moor Street), Old Hall Street (Originally Whiteacre Street) && Castle Street.. Castle Street Was Called That Because It Was Goin To Be The Place Where They Built A Castle.. All Those Roads Still Hve The Same Layout Today && Can Still Be Seen On Modern Maps..
Some Clever Arses Try To Say That When They Changed The Calenders Frm The Old Julian Calendar To The New Gregorian One, That All The Dates Got Mixed Up && That Really Liverpools Birthday Is On The 4th September.. Bt I Dont Think That Is True Because The Charter Was Signed By A King && Is Dated 28th Of August, So Ya Cant Argue With Tha!!
I Had To Take Me Shoes && Socks Off To Work This One Out, Bt I Reckon Liverpool Is 813 Years Old..
So Happy Birthday Liverpool && I Think I Will Hve A Bevy Tonight To Celebrate..
PS: The World Famous Liverbird Holds A Piece Of Seaweed In Its Mouth Because Of Liverpools Connection With The Sea, Bt It Wasnt Always Lyk Tha.. Originally It Was A Broom (A Shrub Which Looks Lyk Gorse) Because That Is The Symbol Of The Plantagenet Family Which King John Was From.. I Love Findin Out Old Stuff, Lyk History && Tha!!
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