Talking Shit #207

Posted by The Bearkeeper on
Category: Open Day/Talking Shit63 Comments

Tags:

Today we are going to ask everyone who visits Jammy Toast to just “Talk Shit” for the day. We ask that anyone who visits Jammy Toast leaves a comment on just about any subject they choose. Funny or sad, true or false, real or fake; we don’t give a shit as long as it is entertaining and doesn’t really hurt anyone. We ask you to do this because we are too busy to think of anything else to post – hopefully everyone will like the freedom to whine and bitch. The rules are pretty simple to explain – basically, anything goes!

Best Comedians Twice As Likely To Be Northerners

Posted by The Bearkeeper on
Category: Davidd's Doodles58 Comments

Tags: ,

Asurvey carried out by the Beano claims that we northerners are twice as likely to be comedians as our southern counter-parts. And if we’re taller than average, a Gemini, the youngest in the family and city-born, there’s more chance that we’ll be naturally funny. An analysis of fifty of Britain’s top comedians looked at shared characteristics and traits. Northerners who made the list included Sir Ken Dodd, Caroline Aherne, Peter Kay and Ross Noble. Sarah Millican, Richard Ayoade and Noel Fielding are Geminis, said to be naturally funny. Those born under Fire signs – Aries, Leo and Sagittarius – are the least likely to make us chuckle. And youngest children of at least three siblings are twice as likely to be funny than the older kids.

Talking Shit #206

Posted by The Bearkeeper on
Category: Open Day/Talking Shit64 Comments

Tags:

Today we are going to ask everyone who visits Jammy Toast to just “Talk Shit” for the day. We ask that anyone who visits Jammy Toast leaves a comment on just about any subject they choose. Funny or sad, true or false, real or fake; we don’t give a shit as long as it is entertaining and doesn’t really hurt anyone. We ask you to do this because we are too busy to think of anything else to post – hopefully everyone will like the freedom to whine and bitch. The rules are pretty simple to explain – basically, anything goes!

Talking Shit #205

Posted by The Bearkeeper on
Category: Open Day/Talking Shit67 Comments

Tags:

Today we are going to ask everyone who visits Jammy Toast to just “Talk Shit” for the day. We ask that anyone who visits Jammy Toast leaves a comment on just about any subject they choose. Funny or sad, true or false, real or fake; we don’t give a shit as long as it is entertaining and doesn’t really hurt anyone. We ask you to do this because we are too busy to think of anything else to post – hopefully everyone will like the freedom to whine and bitch. The rules are pretty simple to explain – basically, anything goes!

Florian Schneider Dies At 73

Posted by The Bearkeeper on
Category: Music64 Comments

Tags: ,

The whole of Jammy Toast was devastated yesterday to learn of the death of Kraftwerk co-founder Florian Schneider. We have been fans of the band for forty-five years and seen them live in concert on many occasions. Florian and friend Ralf Hütter set the template for synthesiser music in the 1970s and 80s with songs like Autobahn and The Model. They achieved both musical innovation and commercial success, and inspired scores of artists across genres ranging from techno to hip-hop. Midge Ure described Schneider as “way ahead of his time”, while singer Edwyn Collins summed it up with: “He’s God”.

Our Granny #38

Posted by The Bearkeeper on
Category: Grannyisms57 Comments

Tags: , ,

Being a rather good bear, George offered to cut the hedge for Granny the other day. The hedge had not been trimmed this year and it was starting to look a little ungainly. Granny was most appreciative and retrieved the hedge trimmers from the tool shed and put them on charge overnight. The next day George set about trimming the hedge only for the trimmers to cut out half way through. George reminded Granny that the same thing had happed last year and it was probably time to get some new trimmers – maybe get a wired trimmer so there is no having to wait for the trimmers to charge overnight and then find it is raining the next day. Granny ordered some new trimmers straight away and paid for them online.

Remembering Derek ‘Blaster’ Bates

Posted by The Bearkeeper on
Category: Remembering Blaster Bates52 Comments

Tags:

Starting soon, we will have somebody new to entertain us when we welcome Derek to Jammy Toast. Derek was an explosives and demolition expert, who was born in Crewe. He will be recalling the bizarre and funny experiences from his long career demolishing buildings, chimneys and tree trunks. Since his retirement, Derek has been in demand for his stories. His tales feature some strong stuff for the period he worked. Once, for instance, he was hired to clear out a farm’s septic tank which had set solid. It was decided explosives was the only way to shift it – an episode Derek describes as “A Shower of Shit over Cheshire”. On another occasion he surprised a young couple in what he describes as “a compromising position” whilst clearing trees for the Oulton Park racing circuit, an incident which gave the Knicker Brook corner its name.