However, during the hospital’s afternoon visiting my grandparents came up to see me and say hello. I was their first grandchild so I should imagine there was a fair degree of excitement. Following the visiting hour introductions, my grandfather went into town and bought me a teddy bear from Robb’s Department Store. That evening he brought the bear up to the hospital to give to me only to be stopped at the maternity ward door and told that evening visiting was for fathers only. My grandfather, not to be denied, announced that he was the father and marched straight passed the startled nurses.
At the time I was born, my mother was eighteen and my grandfather was fifty. This was the 1960s, I am surprised he was not arrested on the spot but nobody said anything. My grandfather gave me the teddy bear and spent an hour chatting to Granny (my mother, remember). That teddy bear was none-other than Great Uncle Bimbo who, if you read the original Jammy Toast, you may remember.
Many years later, I was told the story of my grandfather’s shenanigans getting into ‘father’s only’ visiting time and I confronted him about it. He denied it was a deliberate ploy and said that he thought that visiting was for ‘fathers of the mothers’ only. Yes, we believe you but thousands wouldn’t!
It might be worth mentioning at this time that my grandfather was called ‘Da’ (pronounced ‘dar’). This was because as a very young child I heard Granny calling him ‘Dad’ but I couldn’t pronounce that so it kinda came out as “Dar”. It stuck and he was called Da by family, friends and even work colleagues for the rest of his life.
I have often been asked where I get my love of teddy bears from and that is probably the man.
Luckily for me, and Bimbo, he lived a long life, being born just before the First World War. He lived through many things during his lifetime. Two World Wars, the Titanic sinking, the creation of the USSR and the bringing down of the Berlin Wall, the invention of Penicillin, Yuri Gagarin becoming the first man in space, Nelson Mandela’s jailing and his release, the first man to walk on the moon, the Falklands war and he saw the Chernobyl Nuclear disaster (on the news, I hasten to add, he wasn’t actually there).
He even voted for Margaret Thatcher but we will gloss over that!
Not only was he the one responsible for my love of teddy bears but he was probably the one who gave me my ‘childish’ outlook on life. He used to buy my comics when I was young but the whole family knew he bought them more for himself than he did for me. He would spend hours reading ‘The Lion’ and ‘The Tiger’. It often got to the point where I would have to ask if I could ‘borrow’ my own comics to read them. By which time they were usually wet because he had been reading them in the bath.
At Christmas time, he would be the one looking stupid, still wearing his Christmas-cracker hat long after everyone else had put theirs in the bin. He also carried on driving for years after he was safe on the roads. Some of his expeditions through Raby Mere were the stuff of legend. He never passed a driving test in his life; he was granted a licence around the time of the Second World War and, because all the examiners were away at war, they just gave people a licence without the need for them to take a test. If they didn’t have an accident within two years then they got to keep the licence.
He was also the man most responsible for turning me into a ‘naughty’ boy. I used to spend weekends at my grandparent’s house and on Saturday’s my grandmother would be at work and we were left at home on our own. This was the day we ate steak and kidney pudding and chips out of the newspaper, had music or the television on too loud and to hell with the neighbours. We could watch the sport and the wrestling without being told off. It was often bedlam on Saturday but we had to have the place looking like a new pin by the time my grandmother got back home.
However, the most eventful thing he ever did was to present me with Bimbo as my ‘birth’ day present. Bimbo came home with me and we grew up together and moved around Merseyside, but everywhere I moved to Bimbo came with me. We used to like the same things, like music and films, and we also had our favourite celebrities.
Years later, I adopted The Chimpton and the pair of us discovered a Renault Bear by the name of Eddie. We both became obsessed with saving these poor, unfortunate bears who were deserted and abandoned to the mercy of charity shops and car boot sales. Bimbo was with me throughout all these years and was given the honorary name of Great Uncle Bimbo by the Renault Bears.
I can tell you more about all that next time.
Bye for now!
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57 Comments on “Da Brings Great Uncle Bimbo Home”
That start of an empire!
I wonder how much Uncle Bimbo cost? Imagine if you still had the receipt.
He does look in pretty good nick for such an old bear… more than we can say for his owner!
Fish and chips always did taste better out of the newspaper.
He voted for the Milk Snatcher?
Your Granddad sounds like a right character!
You know when a joke just isn’t funny…
i miss my bear, i had him since i was a baby but lost him when we moved house.
“Bimbo” is a cool name. x
Wtf is with chemists thinking they’re your doctor and having an attitude like your doctors receptionist?
If only more men were like your grandfather! He sounds like he was a wonderful man.
Living alone is sound until you’re sick
What a brilliant looking bear.
How the hell could I sleep with that bear staring at me?
He is a bit folically challenged.
Not as badly as that fod of yours!!
3:30pm…Gonna save some of this pie for later tonight.
3:31pm…Fuck it. Time for more pie.
Please remember – none of the Government’s guidelines for local lockdown actually prohibit buying tripe.
Great remembering your childhood. The good oul times!
imagine someone you love dying a horrible death from covid and some c*nt called nigel tries telling you its a fake, invented government conspiracy. i’d do time!!
In the unlikely event anyone one cares. My phone is bust.
Call me if you need to talk Scoach x
Anti-maskers are all called “Breathy McBreathface” if they deny it check their birth certificate.
Mrs Brown’s Boys could return at Christmas to spread some festive cheer… someone cough on me immediately please!!
Help.
Can feel a migraine brewing.
Tomorrow isn’t going to be fun.
I’m alive. Iv just ran off from Russell’s Hall Hospital.
Big shout outs to Paddy n Scoach for being… dno what just for being!
Good morning. It’s a fine and warm Sunday ahead for most. Lots of blue fuckin’ sky and sunshine. A bit of a breeze in the south, and some fuckin’ low cloud lingering for northeast England and northern and eastern Scotland. Have a fuckin’ great day.
So it turns out my phone wasn’t charged. I love a good crisis though.
Morning Scoach to early too mow the grass do u think?
My human spotted Dorothy wandering around this plot so she made one of her Nothing Happening films. I don’t mind at all, but you all know how much I love to watch my little Dumpling even in boring little films. I hope you understand.
Rolf report 20 Sept
There are new students on campus! My human dropped me off by the campus coffee shop. I met a new friend. She put her hand out so I could sniff her & she gave me a nice chin scratch. By the time my human started filming, I was eager to start patrolling.
Rolf x
My phones updated overnight & now everything’s almost exactly the same.
Mrs Brown’s Boys could return at Christmas. Have we not suffered enough?
am snorting a big fat roast later x
Am definitely going for a walk today as the car won’t start.
Why have I got cross dressers sending me videos of themselves sucking dick very badly?
Soz x
Health Secretary’s message: “If there is another national lock down, the public will only have themselves to blame.” The govt are insidious creatures, took no ownership of the handling of Covid, deflecting blame. This behaviour is what you should expect from them. Vile people.
I’m doing bovril roasties today if anyone’s arsed?
Here comes the story of The Hurricane, the man the authorities came to blame for something that he never done.
Woke up this morning and I am still dead.
This helping in the garden malarkey is exhausting, think I might have a little lie down and roll about. I’m sure they won’t notice, I’m perfectly camouflaged right?
My daughter woke up n said Donald trump is a silly man why did he tell people to drink bleach, I was impressed with her knowledge for a 6 year old n then she asked me to open a fruit tella for her n now I’m confident she’s mine.
I’m going home tonight and I am so excited to be reunited with my coffee machine!
Lockdown starts again here in 2 days time. Its very decent of the virus not to try & infect anyone until Tuesday.
I had friends promise to tell me If my kid was ugly so I knew.
Got the cockiest fuckin fly in my room here. Just tried to climb in my ear… I called it a tit. Don’t think he understands.
I’m wearing my sleeveless button up cardigan and going for lunch in a golf club. My Jerry Leadbetter fixation has finally come to life.
It’s a beautiful summer’s day. The breeze is erm… Stupendous!
Happy Sunday, Razzbox x
It’s almost fuzzy sock season.
You better watch out
You better not cough
You better not pout
Or Christmas is off
Santa Claus isn’t coming to town
He’s booking a test,
He’s been denied twice,
Can’t find out if he’s contagious or nice
Santa Claus isn’t coming to town
Imagine if we win today. We won’t but if we do I’m going to be an arrogant c*nt.
For afternoon tea, do I have a slice of lemon drizzle cake or a scone with strawberry jam in it? Or both?
I’ve left my kid at her Dads she hasn’t seen him since last Sunday I didn’t even make it home and the phones ringing with him giving out fuck coz she wants to go out with her mates. I really don’t know what he wants me to do about it she hates me equally!!
I see that the actor Alan Cumming has hit out at the “insidious and subliminal racism” faced by Scots who work in London. Load of bollocks. Why would we hate any nation that has won one less world cup than we have, eh?
Lost my house keys, smashed a small window and entered like a elderly fat ninja, opened the front door to find Tink with my house keys.