So off she goes to Asda where she is pretty well known for her antics. She wanders around the store filling the store trolley with everything we needed and running over a few heels into the bargain. If Granny were a bird, her mating call would be, “Oops sorry!” as she runs over the painful part of your heel or ankle with the trolley. After she has maimed a few Asda shoppers she then heads off to the checkout.
At the checkout Granny can’t be bothered with the hustle and bustle of the normal checkouts so she heads for the self-service one. She starts scanning her items as she puts them through and then into her own shopping trolley. Over and over, she picks her items out of the store’s trolley, through the scanner and into her shopping trolley.
Now we all know that Granny is pretty forgetful so when she has finished scanning and packing all the shopping, she fastens up her shopping trolley, places the store trolley into the rack and heads for the exit. She is just leaving the shop as a security guard pounces and tells her she has not paid for her shopping.
Granny was embarrassed but totally apologetic and explained to the security guard that she wasn’t trying to steal the shopping, she had simply forgotten to punch in her pin number and retrieve her debit card. To prove it she had actually left her debit card in the machine. No real harm done and I am sure many others have committed a similar faux pas previously. Granny is never happy performing a simple run-of-the-mill act of forgetfulness and so was off to see if she could outdo herself.
Off she went to Iceland to get a few more bits and pieces and not to be put off by her Asda experience, heads for the self-service checkout again. Yes, you are all probably way ahead of me by now, she only did exactly the same thing again. Tried to walk out of the store without paying for her shopping again!
Once she got home I tried to explain to her she was going to have to come up with a better plan than this because her attempts at shoplifting meant she had to leave her debit card behind and the store would be able to trace her.
Come on Granny, get your thinking cap on, you need a better plan!