Razzi Writes #77

Posted by Erasmus 'Razzi' Bear on
Category: Razzi's Columns20 Comments

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Ihave always been a Royalist bear, I love our Royal Family. The Queen does so much for this country even in her later years, whenever she is needed she heads off to foreign shores to sell England and of course she is respected all over the world. Even Prince Philip’s famous gaffs have kept me entertained over the years. Some of his quotes are legendary; “When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.” However, there is no excuse for Prince Andrew and his behaviour. I really think that he thinks as a member of the Royal Family he is above reproach. He has now found out that he is not.

I didn’t watch the interview with him on TV but I have seen news reports and clips. I can honestly say I have never seen anyone look so guilty. He looks like me when Davidd asks me who ate the last piece of Jammy Toast. Everyone knows it was me, I know it was me and I even know that everyone knows it was me but I still say – in the best Bart Simpson quote – “Don’t have a cow, Man, I didn’t do it!”

It is not just his reputation that is going to be ruined. Many of the organisations and charities that he represented have lost face and probably more following the revelations. The Queen herself has lost face by having to strip him of his £249,000 pocket money. Jebus H Crisps, I only get a pound a week and all the Jammy Toast I can eat.

I found out today that the Queen has also cancelled a 60th birthday party she had planned for Prince Andrew and his charities – although Buck Palace have denied it. The Queen hosted a lavish reception at Buck Palace to mark the Prince of Wales’ 60th birthday in November 2008. Prince Charles and the Duchess of Cornwall were joined by more than 400 guests including European Royalty, friends and members of the Prince’s charities. A similar event had been planned for Andrew’s 60th birthday which, apart from being a great bash, also brings the charities he supports into the limelight and helps them with their fund raising activities. Now with the Duke of York being sacked by 20 of his charities, it is believed he is preparing to give up the remainder of his charity commitments. I personally think he is unlikely to ever resume royal duties again.

Buck Palace sources say that he will still maintain his military roles for now but will not be taking part in any events for the foreseeable future. There are even signs of concern within those military ranks thanks to his links with paedophile Jeffrey Epstein.

Even members of the Royal Family are said to be livid. Charlie, who has been touring in the Pacific, is said to be incandescent with rage at the damage Andrew’s inflicting on the monarchy. And it has strengthened his commitment to forge a slimmed-down Royal Family with fewer hangers-on when he becomes King. Prince William weighed in too, furious at his Uncle’s all-pervading air of entitlement in that car-crash interview.

I really feel sorry for the Queen at the moment. Imagine her sitting in Buck Palace writing the Queen’s Christmas speech – that should make interesting viewing this year. I wonder what gift she will be buying for Andrew; Pizza Express vouchers?

In all seriousness though, if Andrew is not representing or supporting the Queen anymore and is not doing charitable work then really, what is the point of him?

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About the Author

Erasmus 'Razzi' Bear

Self-confessed playbear and lady-killer; Razzi has the heart of many of our friends at his beck and call. Although very hard working in his daytime job as an Assistant Driving Instructor, he also likes to play very hard when the day is done. A smouldering look from Razzi has been known to melt many a fair maiden’s icy heart!


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