Granny always seems to get things mixed up. Everything you say gets turned around inside that head of hers and comes out as something completely different. She was just sitting there watching one of her favourite daytime telly programmes, Loose Woman, when I noticed that the host Andrea was sporting one of those wide eyebrows from Desperate Scousewives. You know the one – where it is really wide towards the centre of the head and then narrows as it gets to the sides. On Desperate Scousewives they call it a “Scousebrow”.