Talking Shit #154

Posted by Lord Davidd of Birko OBE DASc on
Category: Open Day/Talking Shit54 Comments

Today we are going to ask everyone who visits Jammy Toast to just “Talk Shit” for the day. We ask that anyone who visits Jammy Toast leaves a comment on just about any subject they choose. Funny or sad, true or false, real or fake; we don’t give a shit as long as it is entertaining and doesn’t really hurt anyone. We ask you to do this because we are too busy to think of anything else to post – hopefully everyone will like the freedom to whine and bitch. The rules are pretty simple to explain – basically, anything goes!

If you visit Jammy Toast on a “Talking Shit” day then you have to leave at least a comment behind – it’s the law! If you are new to Jammy Toast then just say “Hello” or maybe introduce yourself; tell us how you found us and why you visit. Anything goes today.

Remember, though; Stuff is cool – Spam is not!!

If you break the rules and visit us today but don’t leave a comment then please remember bears have a very particular set of skills; skills acquired over a very long career. Skills that make them a nightmare for people like you. If you leave a comment, that will be the end of the matter. We will not look for you, we will not pursue you. But if you don’t, we will look for you, we will find you, and we will bite and scratch you.

You have been warned!

Garfield StripGarfield is copyright © Paws, Inc. If you like the cartoons we reproduce here on Jammy Toast, please consider purchasing some of the Garfield merchandise. These are available through where you can view them in full-colour and at a higher quality!

About the Author

Lord Davidd of Birko OBE DASc

A sad and lonely old man who used to have a life but it has now been taken over by his dedication to the cause of saving Renault Bears, running Jammy Toast and searching eBay, car boot sales, charity shops, lofts and even under beds for his beloved bears. He has even now taken in Flat Eric to save him from homelessness – his life is no longer his own!

54 Comments on “Talking Shit #154”

  1. Little competition for you all to have a stab at. The young lady needs to get the washing in because it has started raining. She needs to do it quickly so she has to get to the roof using the minimum number of ladders. How few ladders can you use?

  2. I wore my retainers for the first time in a year last night and it hurt so bad. I woke up this morning and I can’t find them anywhere. Apparently sleeping Megan was having none of that nonsense. Can’t wait to see where I find them.

    1. The playoffs are a great leveller. They give the chance for League 1 and 2 sides to be commentated on by the same irrelevant cockwombles as the so-called big boys.

    2. I was in a pub in Stroud once and the entire place decamped to the car park to watch two farmers have a scrap over whether a stone house or a brick house was more likely to fall down. When it was over the victor came back in and said “no fucker talks to me about brick.”

  3. Might reactivate my Insta to see if that one chick and that one dude are still dating the entire internet or they finally got a turn with each other.

  4. Piglet fell down flat on his face. BANG! He lay there, wondering what had happened. At first he thought that the world had blown up; he got cautiously up and looked about him. He was still in the Forest! “Well that’s funny,” he thought. “Where’s my balloon?”

  5. No idea if it’s true ? But the glorious tale about Fylde FC accountant making off with £500k and spending it on hookers and cocaine , is the best thing I’ve heard in ages . He spent the money on £8 a minute webcam strippers . £8 a minute ? They earn less than plumbers !

  6. I found a list I had made two weeks ago amongst a pile of papers on my desk and also one amongst a pile of papers on the floor that I made 7 months ago. I noticed with interest and embarrassment that they were rather similar in content.

  7. just want to know if any of the lads who have used that woman snapchat filter have received any “wyd” texts or dick pics at 3am. not going to lie I hope yous have. payback is a bitch x

  8. ‘Twas the night before Mother’s Day and all through the house
    Nobody was cleaning, not even her spouse
    The kids were on iPads, totally unfair
    While husbands kicked back with nary a care

    The mothers washed clothes and sheets for the beds
    While droplets of sweat fell down from their heads
    With mama in her kerchief giving less than a crap
    What that woman would do for just one fucking nap

    This poem has too many verses, I stammer
    No mother has time for this, it doesn’t matter
    To the moms I wish you a speedy Cleaning Eve
    So a relaxing Mother’s Day may you receive…

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