Talking Shit #226

Posted by Davidd Birko on
Category: Shit71 Comments

Today we are going to ask everyone who visits Jammy Toast to just “Talk Shit”. It has become a bit of a Jammy Toast tradition whereby we ask everyone who visits us to leave a comment on just about any subject they choose. Funny or sad, true or false, real or fake; we don’t give a shit, as long as it is entertaining and doesn’t really hurt anyone’s feelings. We usually ask you to do this because we are too lazy to think of anything else to post. However, people generally enjoy the freedom to whine and bitch. The rules are simple to explain – anything goes!

If you visit Jammy Toast on a “Talking Shit” day; you must leave a comment behind – it’s the law! If you are new to Jammy Toast then just say “Hello” or maybe introduce yourself; tell us how you found us and why you visited. Anything you can think of.

Remember, though; Stuff is cool – Spam is not!

If you break the rules and visit us today and don’t leave a comment then please remember Andreaa has a very particular set of skills; skills acquired over a very long career. Skills that make her a nightmare for people like you. If you leave a comment, that will be the end of the matter. She will not look for you, she will not pursue you. But if you don’t communicate, she will look for you, she will find you, and she will murderize you.

You have been warned!

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Garfield is copyright © Paws, Inc. If you like the cartoons we reproduce here on Jammy Toast, please consider purchasing some of the Garfield official merchandise. These are available through where you can view them in full-colour and at a higher quality!

Posted By

Davidd Birko

A sad and lonely old man who used to have a life but it has now been taken over by his dedication to the cause of saving teddy bears, running Jammy Toast and searching eBay, car boot sales, charity shops, lofts and even under beds for unwanted bears. He has even now taken in Flat Eric to save him from homelessness – his life is no longer his own!

71 Comments on “Talking Shit #226”

  1. ADVISORY FOR UK CATS: Storm Alex is due to arrive this weekend. Get yourself in a nice warm and cosy spot and stay there all weekend. So basically the usual routine.

  2. Every where I go I always seem to attract fucking loons. Sat in the dentists waiting room and this fella starts off with “IMAGINE if an atom bomb was dropped on Liverpool.” Got enough going on with corona ye soft cunt.

  3. Girls have a lovely long soak and feel great until there bath water starts dribbling out their fannies on the way to meet their first date. I remember being pregnant and phoning the ozzy Cos me waters had broke, it was just bath water hahahahahahahahha.

    If anyone says your bath water has never came out your fanny you’re lying!

  4. when your mum starts talking to you and goes through all your brother & sisters names, the cats, the dogs and every other fuckers name before she gets to yours. fuck sake get it together jean.

  5. If you Do Not wear a Mask to avoid getting ill, when all the advice says wear a mask to avoid getting ill, do not be surprised if you get ill.

    Not Getting ill advice there.

  6. I know that picnic benches are supposed to be for picnics but honestly, they make perfect sun-loungers. The wood heats up nicely and there’s plenty of room to stretch out. There’s only one thing missing – can you guess what it is? (thanks Andy for another lovely photo)

  7. Christopher Robin opened his umbrella and put it in the water. It floated but wobbled. Pooh got in. He was just beginning to say that it was all right now, when he found that it wasn’t, so after a short drink, they both got in together, and it wobbled no longer.

  8. We got an email saying that we need things like tripe soup, tripe curry, tripe bolgnese or tripe crisps to win folk over. Myself I don’t fancy any of what she suggested above but gotta try and keep up to date with modern tastes/ideas.

    The key to eternal youth is keeping an open mind – unless, like Nigel Farage, yours was locked shut in 1965 and someone threw away the key.

  9. Morning Campers. My trophy wife is off the hairdressers for 8.30. I’ve already been mugged for £100.

    May as well get up. Curtains are open, windows too, some moronic pap is on the radio and she’s banging the doors. Whereas I slip out the door like a elderly ninja.

  10. Rolf report 3 Oct

    My American human got his favourite boots in Denver Colorado nearly 50 years ago. He has cherished & cared for them over the years. He brought them to England with him 20 years ago. Of course they have tantalising laces so I love it when he puts them on.

    Rolf x

  11. People who can’t be late and people who are always late and aren’t arsed. My leader is due at the hairdressers in 20 mins and is currently fannying about without a care in the world. I’m seething and would of been sat outside since 7.30.

  12. Why did people get complacent when they were told clearly to get back to work but stay at home, don’t meet your family but go to pubs full of strangers, follow the rules unless you are Cummings or my father?

  13. Little GT wouldn’t eat this morning but kept nuzzling up to my leg & walking over to the closed office door. Then he’d come back & do it again. I opened the door & there was Cobweb who’d been accidently “locked” in there. They rubbed noses & then ate platefuls! It’s made my day!

  14. Have to ask the question, how is it OK for 3,000 people to be allowed into the indoor Royal Albert Hall (56% capacity) but not let even 1,000 spectators at outdoor stadium Prenton Park (7% capacity)? Someone please explain the logic.


  15. Rest assured that, however reckless or dangerous it may be, I will allow everyone to break the rules, as long as it makes me look like the man who saved Christmas.


    Miss Ursula Gatsby: “Oh, you’re very cheerful this morning, Mr. Fawlty.”

    Basil Fawlty: “Yes, well, one of the guests has just died.”

  17. Lookin on starting just eat but for bits, grafter leaves it in a designated area, an assigned driver collects and delivers to ye door for a small fee. Need proof of ye webs an purple bin to register!

  18. Could any m*n explain to me why the lad I was seeing when I was 17 took it upon himself to dm me a middle finger emoji and nothing else in the middle of the night? Mate it’s been 18 years!

  19. It’s fuckin criminal wha they’ve done to crisps yeno, just opened a packet an there was literally 5 based in the bottom. I could of fit the full packet in a clippy.

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