Talking Shit #229

Posted by Davidd Birko
Posted on
Category: Shit66 Comments

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oday we are going to ask everyone who visits Jammy Toast to just “Talk Shit”. It has become a bit of a Jammy Toast tradition whereby we ask everyone who visits us to leave a comment on just about any subject they choose. Funny or sad, true or false, real or fake; we don’t give a shit, as long as it is entertaining and doesn’t really hurt anyone’s feelings. We usually ask you to do this because we are too lazy to think of anything else to post. However, people generally enjoy the freedom to whine and bitch. The rules are simple to explain – anything goes!

If you visit Jammy Toast on a “Talking Shit” day; you must leave a comment behind – it’s the law! If you are new to Jammy Toast then just say “Hello” or maybe introduce yourself; tell us how you found us and why you visited. Anything you can think of.

Remember, though; Stuff is cool – Spam is not!

If you break the rules and visit us today and don’t leave a comment then please remember Andreaa has a very particular set of skills; skills acquired over a very long career. Skills that make her a nightmare for people like you. If you leave a comment, that will be the end of the matter. She will not look for you, she will not pursue you. But if you don’t communicate, she will look for you, she will find you, and she will murderize you.

You have been warned!

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Posted By

Davidd Birko

A sad and lonely old man who used to have a life but it has now been taken over by his dedication to the cause of saving Renault Bears, running Jammy Toast and searching eBay, car boot sales, charity shops, lofts and even under beds for his beloved bears. He has even now taken in Flat Eric to save him from homelessness – his life is no longer his own!

66 Comments on “Talking Shit #229”

  1. That picture of a piece of shit turns my stomach, can’t we go back to having the sign like on the old Jammy Toast?

    That way I can eat my tea again on Fridays.

  2. I’m sorry, but people need to understand that it would be irresponsible of us to spend £20m on feeding hungry children. We need to put it towards responsible things like £120m on a Festival of Brexit.

  3. The sheer joy of sitting in the house cause the pubs shut, listening to gobshites letting fireworks off. There’s an hours wait for the chippy and our broadband has conked out so we are on council telly. I thought Question of Sport finished in 1983?

    Fifty shades of something is on the telly. It’s a bit more racy than Gardeners World for a Friday. Anyway if she starts making those eyes at me im pretending to fall asleep.

  4. Britain at the moment is like a shit version of 1984 – the Chestnut Tree Café is closed, Big Brother is on furlough and it’s Joe Fucking Wicks MBE* on the morning telly screen

    *Massive Bell End

  5. My first virtual cat cafe was a great success today. Lots of students took part, posting photos of their own beautiful cats during the session. My American human bribed me with squirty cream so I remained on camera during the cat cafe. It worked a treat!

    Rolf x

  6. Another match on Wingder “Jade” – claims her favourite ice cream as Ben and Jerry’s cookie dough. For that reason I’m OUT. Correct answer is Mr Whippy with flake and strawberry sauce ALL DAY LONG. The search continues…

  7. It’s 10 months since my Dorothy had that awful thing with the glue trap and had to have her lovely fur shaved off. She was so brave and never complained, not even at the vets. Her fur has all grown back now and she looks more beautiful than ever. I love my Dumpling.

  8. Bing- Bong Ladies & gentlemen May I have your attention please? Happy Caturday, I wish to inform you that today I will attempt the world record for consuming breakfasts although this may be superseded by the world record for requesting breakfasts & being refused.

  9. Rolf report 24 Oct

    My virtual cat cafe happened yesterday afternoon. To prepare, my American human took me on a long leash walk so I would remain quiet & on camera with the students rather than zooming around. I was pretty well behaved but completely pooped by last night.

    Rolf x

  10. If it’s any comfort to anyone, I’m in my own habitat and made crumpets last night but must of forgot to turn the toaster on. Buttered them and ate them anyway. By the time I realised it was too late. Difficult times what with the lockdown and that.

  11. I was on the phone with a company & they asked for my postcode so I used the NATO alphabet (papa, hotel etc) & I couldn’t remember the word for J so I said “Jobby”.

  12. I’d love nothing more than to get all done up today and go into town day drinking, starting in the slag and lettuce and end up a disgrace on the last train home with a kebab and a plastic rose a random Irish man in the street bought for me in the futile hope I might shag him.

  13. Having had to isolate for a week and with another to go I feel if it wasn’t for the football being on today I’d be close to jumping out the window.

    Only a game they say.

  14. My kids just went.. Ma I really don’t want to be around people that have no ambition in life I want to surround myself with people that want everything from life.. it was at this point that I realised she is now the Ma!

  15. i lived in germany for 3 years and had my first child there. its an absolutely wonderful country and the people are boss. especially compared to this little tin pot isle full of racists and vindictive little selfish bigots who still go on about a war they had no part in.

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