Talking Shit #236

Posted by Davidd Birko on
Category: Shit60 Comments

Today we are going to ask everyone who visits Jammy Toast to just “Talk Shit”. It has become a bit of a Jammy Toast tradition whereby we ask everyone who visits us to leave a comment on just about any subject they choose. Funny or sad, true or false, real or fake; we don’t give a shit, as long as it is entertaining and doesn’t really hurt anyone’s feelings. We usually ask you to do this because we are too lazy to think of anything else to post. However, people generally enjoy the freedom to whine and bitch. The rules are simple to explain – anything goes!

If you visit Jammy Toast on a “Talking Shit” day; you must leave a comment behind – it’s the law! If you are new to Jammy Toast then just say “Hello” or maybe introduce yourself; tell us how you found us and why you visited. Anything you can think of.

Remember, though; Stuff is cool – Spam is not!

If you break the rules and visit us today and don’t leave a comment then please remember Andreaa has a very particular set of skills; skills acquired over a very long career. Skills that make her a nightmare for people like you. If you leave a comment, that will be the end of the matter. She will not look for you, she will not pursue you. But if you don’t communicate, she will look for you, she will find you, and she will murderize you.

You have been warned!

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Posted By

Davidd Birko

A sad and lonely old man who used to have a life but it has now been taken over by his dedication to the cause of saving teddy bears, running Jammy Toast and searching eBay, car boot sales, charity shops, lofts and even under beds for unwanted bears. He has even now taken in Flat Eric to save him from homelessness – his life is no longer his own!

60 Comments on “Talking Shit #236”

  1. I was driving to collect my kid from school and I couldn’t help but smile at people walking dogs and couples holding hands or little kids coming out of school, i just felt genuinely happy and I realised it’s actually been a long fucking time this year since I felt like that!

  2. I dreamt I was able to talk to my mom somehow in the past, on the phone and I kept telling her how much I loved her, in the most heartfelt of ways and I wish I had thought to say it to her every time we spoke because honestly it never occurred to me that one day she’d be gone.

  3. What’s the worst Christmas present you have received.

    Last year my mum bought me a snow shovel

    My ex bought me a well for an African village via oxfam never used that fuming!

  4. I’ve decided it would be best for everyone involved if I’m a nasty little twat again. Thanks for your cooperation during my weak ass time. But it’s not for me x

  5. My nan showed off to facebook that she’d photographed some seals at the beach, turns out there’s never ever been seals sighted at that beach before & the local council want to get in touch. Now she’s too scared to log into her facebook. Why even lie, Joan?

  6. Boss wen you get a choccy off the christmas tree an it goes ave another one der mate an your like arr ey i cant den it goes no go ed lad you deserve it so you scran it hahahahahaha

  7. Piglet lived in a grand house in the middle of a beech-tree, and the beech-tree was in the middle of the Forest, and Piglet lived in the middle of the house. There was a piece of broken board which had “TRESPASSERS W” on it. Piglet said it was his grandfather’s name.

  8. Rolf report 12 Dec

    Yesterday was my online festive cat cafe for the students. It’s part of my role as a champion for student wellbeing while studying. I wore my sparkly vest for the occasion. Lots of students brought their own cats or posted photos. It was so joyful. We also talked to the students about Robert the Allotment Cat and his crew. Robert’s friend Nat posted photos of them and his books.

    Rolf x

  9. My owner made another Nothing Happening video yesterday. I walk, I stop, I look around, I walk and so on. I don’t know why my human thinks this is worth filming. It’s better when Barbara comes but he was busy and couldn’t make it. I’ll try to do something interesting in the next one.

  10. I was in Asda with 2 full trollies when a little old lady stood behind me at the checkout. She only had a pint of milk so I said, “Is that all you’ve got?
    “She replied, “Yes.”
    So I did the decent thing & told her, “If I were you I’d fuck off to another till. I’m gonna be ages!”

  11. It is exactly one year since the general election, when people voted overwhelmingly for me to let 63,000 people die, completely fuck up the Brexit negotiations and send gunboats to blow up the French because of fish.

  12. Some total scumbag has set our heating to come on in the mornings. Im having to do my exercises naked this morning. Right I’m off to Wavertree swimming baths with Twink, if any top Odgies fancy a bare knuckle dust up in Williamson’s tunnels?

  13. Can’t believe me and Irene caused a public disturbance, got asked to leave a public house and then Irene went on to break an oven in a gaff bc I left her unsupervised. Good to have her back on her bullshit tho tbf.

  14. Happy Caterday all. I am even thankful for the negative things that have made me a stronger and better cat. By negative I mean when I’m told I’m not allowed a third breakfast and stronger because I obtain that third breakfast.

  15. I was asked a very good question a while back, “don’t you possess any ambitions of becoming a politician?” I said, “I’d love to become a politician but I do not possess the flexibility to get my head up my own arse!”

    Just sayin, like!

  16. It’s Caturday and all is quiet at the school, I’m on pawtrol and am staking a little hole in case something small and squeaky comes my way. I live in hope!

  17. We’d like to give a warm Birkenhead welcome to Frederik “The Destroyer” who has flown in from Oslo today. He’s here to deliver a 3 day course on how to sink French fishing boats that stray illegally into the Birkenhead Riviera. Thankfully we aren’t picking up the tab.

  18. I’m genuinely sick of being right all the time you know. People say I’m crazy yeah, but I am yet to be wrong once I get a little feeling about something or someone. It might not make sense at the time but it always does in the end. And I always end up like…

  19. Printer still won’t print. I’ve tried turning it on and off again, I’ve given it a “bish bash Bosh” still no idea why it’s not printing… how rude, the IT department have said that the problem seems to be that there is a big fat ginger backside stuck in the output tray!

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