Then i had a boyfriend who used to kick the shit out of me && put me in hospital twice.. He was always full of remorse afterwards so it was alrite like.. He used to swear he would never do it again && buy me chocolates, flowers && bottles of gin to try && make it up to me.. Let me tell anyone who is reading this, if they hit you once they will do it again… && again… && again.. i didn’t know that at the time but i fuckin’ do now..
So as you can imagine i have a bit of a phobia now about people buying me presents — especially expensive ones!!
So my birthday is coming up at the end of the month && Jay wants to get me a pressie.. i try && explain wot have just told yas && that just get me a bottle of gin or something but no, he won’t listen.. He starts asking what size shoes i take && then when i tell him i don’t want any shoes he goes behind me back && gets me size out of me mum.. Then she tells me that hes bought me a £130 pair of shoes && he’s got me three other pressies too but she doesn’t know what they are — me mum says he just said they are expensive..
I fuckin’ flipped!!
I asked him why doesn’t he ever listen to me && do what i ask instead of doing whatever the fuck he feels like.. It goes on from there && ends in a full-scale knark.. He asks me why i don’t just finish with him because thats what i obviously want judgin’ by the way i behave towards him but that’s shit, i don’t do anything.. i just ask him not to go buying huge, expensive presents because i don’t like it because of the way my ex’s have done it in the past.. But no he doesn’t get that he just says he’s not one of my ex’s && just wants to make a fuss of me.. i know thats nice but i don’t want it && I’ve told him i don’t want it && he’s just fuckin’ ignoring me..
Even Davidd takes Jay’s side saying that his heart is in the right place && that he just wants to show me how much i mean to him but he can do that with a £15 bottle of gin.. i don’t want treating like a princess because i am older now && i know i am not a princess && i never will be.. i would batter Davidd for sayin’ that too but ya can never stay mad at him no matter what he says ‘cos he’s a fuckin’ mong.. He even said am behavin’ like a child who always wants her own way just because i don’t want him buyin me stuff.. Jay’s only ever had one other serious girlfriend who used to tell him to buy her stuff too && i don’t want to come across like her, just being a grabbin’ little bitch.. So Davidd said he is buying me things because he wants to && not because i have ordered him to.. He’s meant to be my mate stop takin’ his side will ya??
So I’ve got a full-house now.. Work is shit.. Friendship with Zoe is shit.. && relationship with Jay is shit.. Bascially, my whole life is shit && am now writin’ this shit lying in bed on me own because Jay has kicked his dummy out of the pram && has gone home to his Nan’s.. Why can’t he just do wot i ask, it’s not that fuckin’ hard && it would save him a fortune in presents..
So another week, another fuckin’ disaster!!
…and don’t think I’m textin’ ya first in the mornin’ either ya little gobshite.